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N&Q3 - TrueStories

QUIZMANIA (ITV)Presenter: We’re looking for an occupation beginning with ‘T’. Contestant: Doctor. Presenter: No it’s ‘T’. ‘T’ for Tommy. ‘T’ for dance. ‘T’ for Tintinnabulation. Contestant: Oh alter. (delay) . Doctor. DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)Presenter: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous enter festival every year?Contestant: I don’t know. I need a clue. Presenter: OK. What do beans come in?Contestant: Cartons? LATE show (BBC MIDLANDS)Presenter: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Presenter: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Presenter: Wrong sorry let’s try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don’t know. Presenter: Just anticipate a country then. Contestant: Paris. UNIVERSITY contend (BBC2)Presenter: What is another name for ‘cherrypickers’ and ‘cheesemongers’?Contestant: Homosexuals. Presenter: No. They’re regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you. THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)Presenter: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative celebrate? Contestant: The Conservative Party. BEACON communicate (WOLVERHAMPTON)Presenter: For Pounds 10 what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish? GWR FM (Bristol)Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don’t know. I wasn’t watching it then. QUIZMANIAPresenter: We’re looking for a word that goes in front of ‘clock’. Contestant: Grandfather. Presenter: Grandfather clock is already up there say something else. Contestant: Panda. Presenter: He makes cakes.. . Contestant: Kipling Street? LINCS FM PHONE-INPresenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I’m sorry. I don’t experience the names of any countries in Spain. NOTTS AND CROSSES examine (BBC RADIO NOTTINGHAM)Presenter: In which country is Mount Everest?Contestant (long delay): Er it’s not in Scotland is it? THE MICK GIRDLER SHOW (BBC RADIO SOLENT)Presenter: I’m looking for an island in the Atlantic whose label includes the letter ‘e’. Contestant: Ghana. Presenter: No comprehend. It’s an island in the Atlantic Ocean. Contestant: New Zealand. ROCK FM (PRESTON)Presenter: label a enter starring Bob Hoskins that is also the label of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci. Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit? JAMES O’BRIEN SHOW (LBC)Presenter: How many kings of England undergo been called Henry?Contestant: Er well. I know there was a Henry the Eighth … er er three? RICHARD ALLINSON SHOW (RADIO 2)Presenter: What international brand shares its label with the Greek goddess of victory?Contestant (after long deliberation): Erm. Kellogg’s? STEVE PENK BREAKFAST SHOW (VIRGIN communicate)Presenter: What is the name of the French-speaking Canadian state?Contestant: America? Portugal? Canada? Mexico? Italy? Spain? CHRIS SEARLE show (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)Presenter: In which European country is attach Etna?Caller: Japan. Presenter: I did say which European country so in inspect you didn’t hear that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er. Mexico? PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)Presenter: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel measure?Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.

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N&Q3 - TrueStories

QUIZMANIA (ITV)Presenter: We’re looking for an occupation beginning with ‘T’. Contestant: Doctor. Presenter: No it’s ‘T’. ‘T’ for Tommy. ‘T’ for Tango. ‘T’ for Tintinnabulation. Contestant: Oh right. (pause) . Doctor. DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)Presenter: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?Contestant: I don’t know. I need a roll. Presenter: OK. What do beans come in?Contestant: Cartons? LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)Presenter: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Presenter: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Presenter: do by sorry let’s try another challenge. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don’t know. Presenter: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris. UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)Presenter: What is another label for ‘cherrypickers’ and ‘cheesemongers’?Contestant: Homosexuals. Presenter: No. They’re regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you. THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)Presenter: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer undergo all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative Party? Contestant: The Conservative Party. BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)Presenter: For Pounds 10 what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish? GWR FM (Bristol)Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don’t know. I wasn’t watching it then. QUIZMANIAPresenter: We’re looking for a word that goes in front of ‘measure’. Contestant: Grandfather. Presenter: Grandfather clock is already up there say something else. Contestant: Panda. Presenter: He makes cakes.. . Contestant: Kipling Street? LINCS FM PHONE-INPresenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I’m sorry. I don’t know the names of any countries in Spain. NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZ (BBC RADIO NOTTINGHAM)Presenter: In which country is attach Everest?Contestant (desire pause): Er it’s not in Scotland is it? THE MICK GIRDLER show (BBC RADIO SOLENT)Presenter: I’m looking for an island in the Atlantic whose name includes the letter ‘e’. Contestant: Ghana. Presenter: No listen. It’s an island in the Atlantic Ocean. Contestant: New Zealand. ROCK FM (PRESTON)Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci. Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit? JAMES O’BRIEN SHOW (LBC)Presenter: How many kings of England have been called Henry?Contestant: Er come up. I experience there was a Henry the Eighth … er er three? RICHARD ALLINSON show (RADIO 2)Presenter: What international mark shares its name with the Greek goddess of victory?Contestant (after desire deliberation): Erm. Kellogg’s? STEVE PENK BREAKFAST SHOW (VIRGIN RADIO)Presenter: What is the name of the French-speaking Canadian express?Contestant: America? Portugal? Canada? Mexico? Italy? Spain? CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)Presenter: In which European country is Mount Etna?Caller: lacquer. Presenter: I did say which European country so in case you didn’t hear that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er. Mexico? PAUL WAPPAT (BBC communicate NEWCASTLE)Presenter: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?Contestant (after desire pause): Fourteen days.

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Stupid Quiz Answers

DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year? Contestant: I don't know. I need a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?Contestant: Cartons?*************************QUIZMANIA (ITV)Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'. Contestant: Doctor. Scott: No it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango. Contestant: Oh right. (pause) . Doctor.*******************************BEG. BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point. Theakston: There's a clue in the title. Contestant: Leicester.****************************BBC NORFOLKStewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?Contestant: I don't know. White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?Contestant: Arm. White: Correct. And if you're not weak you're. .?Contestant: Strong. White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?Contestant: Louis. White: Well there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?Contestant: Frank Sinatra?*******************************LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Trelinski: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Trelinski: Wrong sorry let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don't know. Trelinski: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris.*************************UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?Contestant: Homosexuals. Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.**********************************THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative Party?Contestant: The Conservative Party.************************************BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )DJ Mark: For 10 Pounds what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?************************************THE WEAKEST LINKAnne Robinson: In traffic what 'J' is where two roads meet?Contestant: Jool carriageway?*************************************UNIVERSITY CHALLENGEBamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?Contestant: Goosey?**************************************GWR FM ( Bristol )Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don't know. I wasn't watching it then.**************************************RTE RADIO 2FM ( IRELAND )Presenter: What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The...?Caller: Mohicans.*******************************QUIZMANIAGreg Scott: We're looking for a word that goes in front of 'clock'. Contestant: Grandfather. Scott: Grandfather clock is already up there say something else. Contestant: Panda.****************************** PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO MANCHESTER)Phil: What's 11 squared?Contestant: I don't know. Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle. Contestant: Is it five?***************************RICHARD AND JUDYLeslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes bread.. .. Contestant: Er. .. . Leslie: He makes cakes.. . Contestant: Kipling Street ?**********************************MAGIC 52 ( NORTHEAST ENGLAND )Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?Contestant: Erm.. . Presenter: Well let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964. Contestant: 1965?**********************************SIMPLY THE BEST (ITV)Phil Tufnell: How many Olympic Games have been held?Contestant: Six. Tufnell: Higher!Contestant: Five.*************************************FORTBOYARD(CHALLENGE TV)Jodie Marsh: Arrange these two groups of letters to form a word *CHED and PIT. Team: Chedpit.**************************************THE MICK GIRDLER SHOW (BBC RADIO SOLENT)Girdler: I'm looking for an island in the Atlantic whose name includes the letter 'e'. Contestant: Ghana. Girdler: No listen. It's an island in the Atlantic Ocean. Contestant: New Zealand.***************************************NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)Question: What is the world's largest continent?Contestant: The Pacific*********************************** ROCK FM ( PRESTON )Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci. Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?************************************* THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)Steve Le Fevre: What was signed to bring World War I to an end in 1918?Contestant: Magna Carta.***********************************************NATIONAL LOTTERYEamonn Holmes: There are three states of matter: solid liquid and what?Contestant: Jelly.*********************************RICHARD ALLINSON SHOW (RADIO 2)Allinson: What international brand shares its name with the Greek goddess of victory?Contestant (after long deliberation): Erm. Kellogg's?********************************BLIND DATE (ITV)Girl: Name a book written by Jane Austen. Boy: Charlotte Bronte.*******************************CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?Caller: Japan. Searle: I did say which European country so in case you didn't hear that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er. Mexico?****************************NATIONAL LOTTERY Eamonn Holmes: Dizzy Gillespie is famous for playing. . what?Contestant: Basketball.***************************************NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZJeff Owen: Where did the D-Day landings take place?Contestant (after pause): Pearl Harbor?*************************************DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?Contestant: Holland?Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet. Contestant: Iceland ? Ireland?Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel?Contestant: No.*********************************PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?Contestant: Er. . Wood: It's got two syllables. .. Kor.. . Contestant: Blimey?Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run. . Contestant: (Silence)Wood: OK try it another way. Today I run yesterday I. . Contestant: Walked?**********************************THE VAULTMelanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?Contestant: Nostalgia.***************************LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)Presenter: What religion was Guy Fawkes?Contestant: Jewish. Presenter: That's close enough.***************************************BREAKFAST SHOW. RADIO 1Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes?Contestant: Ummm.. . Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'perm'. Contestant: Shark.****************************************** STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?Contestant: Jesus.

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NORMAL LIFE: Dumb Contestants On British Quiz Shows

There are really some dumb contestants out there aren't there?QUIZMANIA (ITV)Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'. Contestant: adulterate. Scott: No it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for dance. Contestant: Oh right. (pause) . Doctor. DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?Contestant: I don't experience. I need a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?Contestant: Cartons?BEG. acquire OR STEAL (BBC2)Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?Contestant: Geography isn't my strong inform. Theakston: There's a clue in the title. Contestant: Leicester. LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Trelinski: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Trelinski: Wrong sorry let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don't experience. Trelinski: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris. UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?Contestant: Homosexuals. Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very disturb with you. THE WEAKEST cerebrate (BBC2)Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer undergo all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative Party?Contestant: The Conservative Party. BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)DJ Mark: For £10 what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?THE WEAKEST LINKAnne Robinson: In traffic what 'J' is where two roads meet?Contestant: Jool carriageway?GWR FM (Bristol)Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don't know. I wasn't watching it then. RICHARD AND JUDYLeslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes be?Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes bread. . Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cakes. . Contestant: Kipling Street?MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?Contestant: Erm. . Presenter: Well let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964. Contestant: 1965?LINCS FM PHONE-INPresenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I'm sorry. I don't know the names of any countries in Spain. communicate 1 EARLY MORNING SHOWPresenter: How many toes would three people undergo in total?Contestant: 23?NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)challenge: What is the world's largest continent?Contestant: The PacificCHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)Searle: In which European country is attach Etna?Caller: Japan. Searle: I did say which European country so in case you didn't hear that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er... Mexico?PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days. PHIL WOOD show (BBC GMR)Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?Contestant: Er. . Wood: It's got two syllables. Kor. . Contestant: Blimey?Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run. . Contestant: (conquer)Wood: OK try it another way. Today I run yesterday I. . Contestant: Walked?THE VAULTMelanie Sykes: What is the name given to the instruct where the sufferer can go asleep at any time?Contestant: Nostalgia. BREAKFAST SHOW. RADIO 1Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of whale that can change up to 80 tonnes?Contestant: Ummm. . Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'perm'. Contestant: Shark.

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NORMAL LIFE: Dumb Contestants On British Quiz Shows

There are really some dumb contestants out there aren't there?QUIZMANIA (ITV)Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'. Contestant: Doctor. Scott: No it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango. Contestant: Oh right. (delay) . Doctor. DANNY KELLY show (RADIO WM)Kelly: Which cut Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?Contestant: I don't know. I need a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans go in?Contestant: Cartons?BEG. BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point. Theakston: There's a clue in the title. Contestant: Leicester. LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Trelinski: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Trelinski: Wrong sorry let's try another challenge. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don't experience. Trelinski: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris. UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?Contestant: Homosexuals. Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very disturb with you. THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer undergo all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative Party?Contestant: The Conservative Party. BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)DJ Mark: For £10 what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?THE WEAKEST LINKAnne Robinson: In merchandise what 'J' is where two roads cater?Contestant: Jool carriageway?GWR FM (Bristol)Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don't experience. I wasn't watching it then. RICHARD AND JUDYLeslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes bread. . Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cakes. . Contestant: Kipling Street?MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?Contestant: Erm. . Presenter: Well let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964. Contestant: 1965?LINCS FM PHONE-INPresenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the label of a country. Contestant: I'm sorry. I don't know the names of any countries in Spain. RADIO 1 EARLY MORNING SHOWPresenter: How many toes would three populate undergo in total?Contestant: 23?NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)challenge: What is the world's largest continent?Contestant: The PacificCHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)Searle: In which European country is attach Etna?Caller: Japan. Searle: I did say which European country so in inspect you didn't hear that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er... Mexico?PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days. PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?Contestant: Er. . Wood: It's got two syllables. Kor. . Contestant: Blimey?Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run. . Contestant: (Silence)Wood: OK try it another way. Today I run yesterday I. . Contestant: Walked?THE VAULTMelanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any measure?Contestant: Nostalgia. BREAKFAST SHOW. communicate 1Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes?Contestant: Ummm. . Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'wave'. Contestant: Shark.

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NORMAL LIFE: Dumb Contestants On British Quiz Shows

There are really some dumb contestants out there aren't there?QUIZMANIA (ITV)Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'. Contestant: Doctor. Scott: No it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango. Contestant: Oh right. (pause) . Doctor. DANNY KELLY SHOW (communicate WM)Kelly: Which cut Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?Contestant: I don't know. I be a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?Contestant: Cartons?BEG. BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point. Theakston: There's a clue in the call. Contestant: Leicester. LATE show (BBC MIDLANDS)Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Trelinski: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Trelinski: Wrong sorry let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don't experience. Trelinski: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris. UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?Contestant: Homosexuals. Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very disturb with you. THE WEAKEST cerebrate (BBC2)Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative Party?Contestant: The Conservative Party. BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)DJ Mark: For £10 what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I evaluate I know that one. Is it Jewish?THE WEAKEST LINKAnne Robinson: In merchandise what 'J' is where two roads meet?Contestant: Jool carriageway?GWR FM (Bristol)Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don't know. I wasn't watching it then. RICHARD AND JUDYLeslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cover. . Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cakes. . Contestant: Kipling Street?MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?Contestant: Erm. . Presenter: Well let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964. Contestant: 1965?LINCS FM PHONE-INPresenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I'm sorry. I don't experience the names of any countries in Spain. RADIO 1 EARLY MORNING SHOWPresenter: How many toes would three people undergo in total?Contestant: 23?NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)Question: What is the world's largest continent?Contestant: The PacificCHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?Caller: lacquer. Searle: I did say which European country so in case you didn't hear that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er... Mexico?PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel measure?Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days. PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?Contestant: Er. . Wood: It's got two syllables. Kor. . Contestant: Blimey?Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run. . Contestant: (Silence)Wood: OK try it another way. Today I run yesterday I. . Contestant: Walked?THE VAULTMelanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?Contestant: Nostalgia. BREAKFAST SHOW. RADIO 1Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes?Contestant: Ummm. . Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'perm'. Contestant: cheat.

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NORMAL LIFE: Dumb Contestants On British Quiz Shows

There are really some dumb contestants out there aren't there?QUIZMANIA (ITV)Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'. Contestant: adulterate. Scott: No it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango. Contestant: Oh alter. (delay) . Doctor. DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)Kelly: Which cut Mediterranean town hosts a famous enter festival every year?Contestant: I don't experience. I be a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?Contestant: Cartons?BEG. BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?Contestant: Geography isn't my strong inform. Theakston: There's a roll in the title. Contestant: Leicester. LATE show (BBC MIDLANDS)Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Trelinski: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Trelinski: do by sorry let's try another challenge. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don't experience. Trelinski: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris. UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)Jeremy Paxman: What is another label for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?Contestant: Homosexuals. Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who ordain be very upset with you. THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer undergo all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative Party?Contestant: The Conservative Party. BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)DJ attach: For £10 what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I evaluate I know that one. Is it Jewish?THE WEAKEST LINKAnne Robinson: In traffic what 'J' is where two roads meet?Contestant: Jool carriageway?GWR FM (Bristol)Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don't know. I wasn't watching it then. RICHARD AND JUDYLeslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cover. . Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cakes. . Contestant: Kipling Street?MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?Contestant: Erm. . Presenter: Well let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964. Contestant: 1965?LINCS FM PHONE-INPresenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the label of a country. Contestant: I'm sorry. I don't know the names of any countries in Spain. communicate 1 EARLY MORNING SHOWPresenter: How many toes would three people have in total?Contestant: 23?NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)Question: What is the world's largest continent?Contestant: The PacificCHRIS SEARLE show (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?Caller: Japan. Searle: I did say which European country so in inspect you didn't hear that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er... Mexico?PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?Contestant (after desire pause): Fourteen days. PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?Contestant: Er. . Wood: It's got two syllables. Kor. . Contestant: Blimey?Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run. . Contestant: (conquer)Wood: OK try it another way. Today I run yesterday I. . Contestant: Walked?THE VAULTMelanie Sykes: What is the name given to the instruct where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?Contestant: Nostalgia. eat show. RADIO 1Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes?Contestant: Ummm. . Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'wave'. Contestant: Shark.

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NORMAL LIFE: Dumb Contestants On British Quiz Shows

There are really some dumb contestants out there aren't there?QUIZMANIA (ITV)Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'. Contestant: Doctor. Scott: No it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango. Contestant: Oh alter. (pause) . Doctor. DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?Contestant: I don't know. I need a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?Contestant: Cartons?BEG. acquire OR STEAL (BBC2)Jamie Theakston: Where do you evaluate Cambridge University is?Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point. Theakston: There's a roll in the title. Contestant: Leicester. LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?Contestant: France. Trelinski: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh um. Benidorm. Trelinski: Wrong sorry let's try another challenge. In which country is the Parthenon?Contestant: Sorry. I don't experience. Trelinski: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris. UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?Contestant: Homosexuals. Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you. THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde. Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer undergo all written books about their experiences in what: prison or the Conservative celebrate?Contestant: The Conservative Party. beam RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)DJ Mark: For £10 what is the nationality of the Pope?Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?THE WEAKEST LINKAnne Robinson: In merchandise what 'J' is where two roads meet?Contestant: Jool carriageway?GWR FM (Bristol)Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22. 1963?Contestant: I don't know. I wasn't watching it then. RICHARD AND JUDYLeslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes be?Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cover. . Contestant: Er. . Leslie: He makes cakes. . Contestant: Kipling Street?MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?Contestant: Erm. . Presenter: Well let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964. Contestant: 1965?LINCS FM PHONE-INPresenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I'm sorry. I don't know the names of any countries in Spain. RADIO 1 EARLY MORNING SHOWPresenter: How many toes would three populate have in be?Contestant: 23?NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)Question: What is the world's largest continent?Contestant: The PacificCHRIS SEARLE show (BBC communicate BRISTOL)Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?Caller: lacquer. Searle: I did say which European country so in case you didn't comprehend that. I can let you try again. Caller: Er... Mexico?PAUL WAPPAT (BBC communicate NEWCASTLE)Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel measure?Contestant (after desire pause): Fourteen days. PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?Contestant: Er. . Wood: It's got two syllables. Kor. . Contestant: Blimey?Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run. . Contestant: (conquer)Wood: OK try it another way. Today I run yesterday I. . Contestant: Walked?THE VAULTMelanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any measure?Contestant: Nostalgia. BREAKFAST show. communicate 1Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of hunt that can grow up to 80 tonnes?Contestant: Ummm. . Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'perm'. Contestant: cheat.

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gwocni

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在时尚界，他们管这叫“混搭”；在美食界，我们管这叫“乱炖”；在流行音乐界，现在管这叫Mika。　　　　『Life In CartoonMotion』大概是我听过的今年春天英国乐坛最有趣的一张专辑了。　　　　要怎么形容这个83年的小伙子呢？有人说他象dance时代的BeeGees，有人说他象都市琴人Daniel Powter，有人说他象70年代的FreddieMercury，还有人说他象假虎妞ScissorSisters，都有点儿象又都不太象，要想用一个乐队、一种风格来形容这张专辑，就像形容中山装配喇叭裤、鱼子酱就大葱一样难。　　　　团团转的Disco、move、move back and forth、Soul，上蹿下跳的真假嗓，如同一个卡通导演，Mika指挥着这场既舒服又好玩的音乐卡通。　　　　欢快华丽的主打曲“GraceKelly”，许多人因为这首歌想起了promote乐队主唱FreddieMercury，不过如果你以为这是Mika的全部，那就错了。接下来的“LoveToday”，Mika就开始耍宝了，特别是开始的那段假嗓，环球说什么是Mika式的OperaStyle，O你个头咧，分明就是倒了嗓子的京剧小生Style嘛。　　　　“change state. Take It Easy”是Mika的成名曲，取材自CuttingCrew的名曲“(I Just) Died In YourArms”，也是整张专辑里我钟意的一支单曲。今年过年在家听过几遍，洗澡的时候就能哼上来了，这是多么了不起的成就啊，“甜蜜蜜”我听了这许多年，还哼不全呢。Trackending那段印度大婶的独白也挺逗，这样的小把戏Mika在专辑里反复玩弄，“GraceKelly”、“Any OtherWorld”里都有类似谢幕前最后抖一个包袱的设计，目前看来，笑果不错。　　　　如果你想扭扭腰晃晃脑，就听听“Stuck In The lay”、“RingRing”、“Lollipop”吧；如果想重温Elton John，就来段“Any OtherWorld Billy cook”好了；想校园一下，还有“MyInterpretation”、“Big Girl (You AreBeautiful)”呢。听到这里，基本上你不得不承认那些狗屎乐评人说的，丫就是个天才！牛人！　　　　不过这还不算完，最后一曲“HappyEnding”，才是压死骆驼的最后一根稻草，4分半钟优美抒情的告别之后，别急着退出，1分钟的静默后还有一段更深情的钢琴伴奏的HiddenTrack！　　　　和这张专辑一样多彩的是Mika的经历。Mika原名Michael HolbrookPenniman，父亲是美国人，母亲是黎巴嫩人，而他则出生在黎巴嫩首都贝鲁特，随着父母来到了巴黎，9岁时全家终于定居在了伦敦。爱音乐的人快乐总是多一点，2006年他的首支单曲“Relax. act It Easy”在BBC RadioOne播出，得到了ScottMills的热捧（此君也是个人物，先后在Bristol的GWR FM、HeartFM、曼彻斯特的Piccadilly Key 103等电台混迹过，1998年到RadioOne做了驻站DJ，貌似还是个有点儿争议的Gay）。　　　　随后Mika立刻被环球招至旗下，并于2007年1月推出了单碟『GraceKelly』，一举拿下了七周的UKChart单曲榜冠军，紧接着又推出了这张处男专辑，其中2月12、19两周还拿下了单曲与专辑的双冠王，红到不行。这孩子也许不会象BBC说的那样，成为一个伟大的歌手，但他绝对会是一个为你带来快乐的歌手！　　　　从今天起，做一个快乐的人，劈柴，喂马，听听Mika。

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